Search This Blog

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Vending Machines, Manholes and Fire Hydrants


OK, so I'm all for creativity, but this is DERANGED and DELUSIONAL.

Look closely at the vending machine closest to the camera; IT HAS FEET.
That is because it is actually an OUTFIT designed by a woman in Japan to disguise people from would-be muggers/assailants. Why?
“It is just easier for Japanese to hide,” Ms. Tsukioka said. “Making a scene would be too embarrassing.” She said her vending machine disguise was inspired by a trick used by the ancient ninja, who cloaked themselves in black blankets at night."
Ah, yes, the anciet ninja, of course. I'm sure he would be especially impressed with the following:
"Take the “manhole bag,” a purse that can hide valuables by unfolding to look like a sewer cover. Lay it on the street with your wallet inside, and unwitting thieves are supposed to walk right by." (By "unwitting" I'm assuming the article means "blind").
So, you might be thinking, what about the children? Aren't they just as susceptible to predators and yet too small to disguise themselves as a full-size vending machine and too big to lay down and play manhole? Don't worry; that's all been taken care of. The solution? A backpack that a child can turn inside out and stuff themselves into to look like a regular ol' firehydrant. All of this is true.
I have one word of advise to the consumers of these brilliant guises: DON'T GET CAUGHT. Seriously, be the most convincing damn soda machine/fire hydrants you can be because if a would-be criminal catches you pulling a stunt like that, you WILL get your ass kicked just on principle. (and I imagine it's not easy running in that get-up).

1 comment:

Stanley said...

Does the recent blog silence mean you've changed your mind and are hiding in a fake vending machine?